


The Missing Hat

by Aida



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Bofur might just smack a bitch, Courtship, Fluff, M/M, Or just insult some dogs, Pining, Ye Olde Courting Trope
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-01
Updated: 2013-04-01
Packaged: 2017-12-07 03:54:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/743907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aida/pseuds/Aida
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bofur's already worrying about his family, the quest, and tying to court a certain hobbit. He doesn't need to lose his hat to top it all off!</p><p>(Or: A courting fic with lots of fluffiness.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Missing Hat

**Author's Note:**

> Some Boffins, because the world needs more Boffins. I do like Bagginshield, but between the two, I think Boffins is my fav (even though I tend to write more towards Bagginshield. I don't get it either)

Bofur paused in his whittling to inspect the little piece of wood he was carving. He was almost done with his gift, and he had already started over with this piece five times. One little mistake, and he would have to start over, even if it was barely noticeable. It had to be perfect. All of them had to be. 

For nothing else would be good enough to start courting Bilbo Baggins.

Ever since he first glanced up at him from the floor of his hobbit hole, he was smitten. His honey-colored curls, big honest eyes, and large hairy feet were much different to what a dwarf would find attractive, but Bofur found him to be beautiful. Conversing with him and travelling with him only made him more lovely. The miner-slash-toymaker did all he could to make sure the company’s burglar was safe, that he was warm, and that he smiled whenever they weren’t being attacked by orcs, wargs, or any other type of wild beast. 

While he knew the chances of winning Bilbo’s heart were quite slim, he had to at least try. For he couldn’t bear living without at least being certain that Bilbo only wanted to be friends (even if it did break his heart at the mere thought of it). The odds were against him (different races, different backgrounds, and a king that had recently begun to warm up to the burglar), but that would not be stopping him.

That was why he was finishing up one of the wooden buttons he had made for the hobbit. It was standard for dwarven courting; the very first step in the entire process: Impress your intended with your craft/warrior prowess. He didn’t think a grown hobbit, no matter how small, would be that impressed with a toy, nor could he go off and dig up any precious stones for him from a nearby mountain. So, he settled with his whittling. And since Bilbo had lost all but one of his buttons in the caves amongst the goblins, Bofur thought of it as a perfect opportunity to impress Bilbo with his wood carving skills by carving him four new buttons. 

All were different, varying in design and intricacy. And while different, each expressed his love and affection for the hobbit he desperately wished to win over. Bofur counted himself lucky that the company decided to stay for a while at Beorn’s, for he could tend to his gift in peace without worry of an attack. 

With a final delicate flick of his little blade, he beamed down at the little button in his hand. All it needed was a proper resin, to seal and protect the wood, and he would be done.

Proud of himself, he put the finished work in a little pouch with the rest, tucked it underneath his pillow, and blew out the low-burning candle that was nearby. He then burrowed under the covers and fell asleep, dreaming of the hobbit that had captured his heart. 

-

Bofur awoke to the sounds of birds chirping and his brother still snoring on the other side of the room. While he could do without hearing his brother, he still smiled to himself, feeling well-rested and comfortable. A feeling he had not felt since leaving Bilbo’s home of Bag End to start this adventure. He relished in the opportunity to be a bit lazy, taking his time let out a jaw-cracking yawn. He then proceeded to stretch out completely, from the tips of his fingers, to his wriggling toes, even up to the crown of his-.

Something was off.

Bofur went from half-asleep to wide-awake in seconds, sitting up quickly in bed. Despite being dressed and covered in a blanket, he felt completely naked. He looked around his bed, back to his pillow. Frowning, he scratched his head, only to freeze in horror.

His hat was missing.

His trademark hat. The hat his father gave him when he was a wee lad; that he wore since then, even when it covered his eyes. The hat that hardly ever came off unless it was to tend to his hair, and even then it was brief. That precious hat he loved so much was now gone, as if it had walked out on him in the middle of the night. 

Immediately he scrambled out of bed and dropped to the floor, checking under the bed first before crawling around. All in trying to search for his missing hat. 

The ruckus caused his brother and cousin both to awaken (Bifur with a bit of thrashing, and Bombur with a great snort). Bleary-eyed, they watched Bofur rush around on his hands and knees, a wild, desperate look in his eyes.

“B’fur?” Bombur grumped out tiredly. “Wht’s wrong?”

“My hat’s missing.”

“What?”

Bofur looked at his brother with wide, hysterical eyes, and said red-haired dwarf immediately felt wide awake himself.

“My _hat_.” He stated, emphasizing the words. “Is _missing_.”

“You lost your hat?” Bombur asked, sitting up a bit more. 

“I didn’t lose it! I had it on last night, and it just…!” Bofur cried, rising on his knees and gesturing wildly with his hands. “Vanished!”

“How could a hat just vanish?” Bombur rushed on, also worried, for he knew how precious that hat was to his brother. “That’s not possible!”

“I know that!” Bofur cried, tugging at his braids in frustration. “But it’s gone! I don’t know if someone _took_ it, or-!”

They were cut off from a loud snort.

Both brothers turned to their cousin for the first time since their conversation, only to see Bifur smiling and looking quite amused. In fact, he was shaking with laughter.

Bofur’s eyes narrowed. “Bifur…” He started. “Do you know what happened?”

Bifur just shook his head, still silently laughing. This caused Bofur to stand up and stomp over to his cousin’s bed. 

“Bifur, did you take it?” He asked, but Bifur chuckled, shaking his head earnestly. “Then you know what happened, right? Tell me!”

But Bifur continued to shake his head. It was clear that he had some idea, and it obviously tickled the dwarf with an axe head sticking out of his head, but he wasn’t going to be sharing what information he had anytime soon.

Poor Bofur was desperate, and actually felt his eyes sting. Never in his life did he lose his hat, his most precious possession. For something like this to happen…

“Ease up, brother mine.” Bombur said, sliding out of bed. “We’ll look about, see if anyone knows what happened. We’ll find your hat. Not to worry.”

With a shaky breath, Bofur nodded, and lead the charge out of their shared room and down the halls, ready to find answers, and more importantly, his precious hat. 

All three ventured throughout the house, asking questions to their company and the animals that lived with Beorn equally. (Bofur had almost outright accused the dogs with stealing it. He never thought he would live to see the day a dog would glare at him worse than his mother ever did when he caused trouble). At the end, Bofur was in a more harried state than he was that morning, and Bombur was trying, and failing, to comfort him. All the while Bifur watched on, silent and amused as all get out.

They were getting ready to look outside when Balin, who was sitting and smoking his pipe, gave the company concerned looks.

“What seems to be the problem, lads?” The elder dwarf inquired.

“It’s Bofur’s hat.” Bombur explained while Bofur stared dejectedly at the ground. “Woke up this morning and found it missing.”

Something flickered in Balin’s gaze, and he actually smiled. “Ah…” He murmured. “Bofur, I think I know what happened.”

Bofur immediately looked up, hope that he would find his hat rising in his chest. “Really? What happened, Master Balin? Please, you have to tell me!”

“It was stolen.” Balin said, looking all too happy about saying such a dark phrase.

“Stolen!?” Bofur cried. “Who would steal it? Why would they steal it? That’s just…!”

Balin hummed. “Well, you see, Master Bofur, I was conversing with a particular person currently resting in this house about dwarrow courting matters. Just the other day, even.” He explained. “And do you remember the first step of courting?”

“Of course I do!” Bofur snapped, not understanding why such things had to do with his hat. “The first step is impressing your intended with your craft or skill! Or-!”

That was when he froze, understanding dawning in his eyes and hope bursting in his chest. For there was a small, possible connection with courting and his hat being missing, and if it was what he thought it was…

If what Balin was saying was the truth, that would mean all of Bofur’s hopes and prayers pertaining a certain hobbit would be answered. 

“That’s right, Master Bofur.” Balin stated. “I do believe your hat was stolen… by a burglar. A burglar who is quite light on his feet, despite his feet being rather big.”

Bofur blinked, then turned to his cousin, who smiled kindly at the younger, hatless dwarf. 

“That’s why… you saw Bilbo…?” 

Bifur just pinched his fingers together and used them to flick his cousin affectionately against the forehead. 

Bofur knew that Bifur had a soft spot for Bilbo, and that he fully approved of Bofur’s choice and supported him since he made it clear his wishes to court the hobbit. If it was all true, then his cousin must’ve woken up to see Bilbo take the hat, and, knowing what it was about, decided to let it happen for the sake of their courtship.

“I…” Bofur started, feeling his face heat. “S’cuse me!”

With that, Bofur rushed back to the room he shared with his brother and cousin, not missing it when Balin called out to him.

“I do believe the lad’s outside by the big tree!”

Bofur rushed towards said tree after collecting the pouch that he had stowed away under his pillow. Out of breath and heart achingly full of hope, he paused in front of one of the bigger trees on Beorn’s property. Looking around at the base, he almost lost hope before looking up, and his heart burst.

For up on the lowest branch sat Bilbo Baggins, the company burglar. One leg was swinging precariously off the branch while the other was laid out along it. He was smoking his pipe and gazing out into the distance…

And Bofur’s hat sat atop his head.

“Bilbo!” The toymaker called, voice crackling slightly, truly overwhelmed.

The hobbit immediately snapped out of his musings and looked down at Bofur. A bright blush spread from the tips of his ears and on the apples of his cheeks, and he gave Bofur a sweet, hopeful smile, eyes brimming with affection.

Bofur returned the look wholeheartedly.

-

Some hours later, Bilbo and Bofur came back inside, their appearances only slightly different. Bilbo, with his waistcoat on and fully buttoned, one made of brass and the other four of wood and carved with a meticulous and delicate hand. Bofur, his missing hat since returned, but now with a crown of flowers on top. 

Both were holding hands, and both were smiling at each other. 

Many of the company cheered at the sight, for it was quite obvious to them all how besotted Bofur was, and none had missed the looks Bilbo sent the toymaker’s way. Even Thorin, who was relaxing not too far away, had grinned and nodded, showing his own discrete approval.

Approval assured, they say in a corner and started on the next step of their courtship: hair-braiding. To state that they were a courting couple, and for both of them to stake their claim on the other.

Bilbo had just finished his own (with Bofur’s kind guidance), and Bofur was working on Bilbo’s braid when Bifur and Bombur approached them.

“I admit, Bilbo.” Bombur stated with a grin. “You gave us quite a fright earlier. Poor Bofur had no idea where his hat had gone. Truly, it was an impressive showing of your skills!”

“Ah-Thank you.” Bilbo said, ears turning pink as Bofur fought with his short (soft, lovely), practically untamable hair. Said toymaker had to fight the urge to kiss one of the tips. “I… I didn’t mean to cause too many problems, but-.”

“Think nothing of it.” Bombur replied, looking towards his cousin. “We just wanted to welcome you into the family.”

Bilbo beamed. “Thank you.” He replied. “And you’re welcome to mine.”

Bombur returned the smile and nodded, wandering off to go about his business. Bifur, however, lingered with a wry smile of his own. Eventually, he leaned over and ruffled the hobbit’s hair. Usually, such acts were met with anger and indignation, but Bilbo was too happy at the moment: for weeks, he had pined for Bofur, and when he had caught a look in the toymaker’s eyes aimed towards him, he had desperately tried to find a way to let his affections be known, and hoped they were returned. Eventually, he asked Balin about it, and that was how he wound up slipping into their room, plucking Bofur’s hat off his head and kept it with him until morning, when he had slunk away and climbed the tree, lighting his pipe and placing the hat on his head. Waiting and hoping that his intentions were clear, and that they were well received. And well received they were. 

So Bilbo smiled at the dwarf, getting extra eye crinkles in return. 

Bifur then left his cousin and the hobbit to it, but not before giving his brother an extra finger flick to his forehead. He did love his cousins, but truly, they could be outright idiots at times, especially in affairs of the heart. At least Bombur had his wife waiting for him at home, and Bofur had a kind, yet strange hobbit as his own.

He now just wondered if hobbits would take well to them back in the Shire.

Bifur would find out later that, yes, they would. Especially the children.

**Author's Note:**

> ... AND THEN THEY ADOPTED FRODO AND BECAME A HAPPY FAMILY AND THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER UNTIL BILBO'S ESCAPADES WITH GOLLUM CAME AND BIT THEM ALL IN THE ASS.
> 
> THE END!
> 
>  
> 
> AKA: Sorry if the ending doesn't seem right. The author had problems with it as well.


End file.
